Sometimes clients attribute their own wisdom to me. I think that was the case recently when a client told me she found it helpful that I had said it’s important to help others keep their dignity. I’d like to believe I said it. I certainly agree with it.
Some behavioral stuff that’s important in following through on that is focusing on the other and, though it sounds like an oxymoron, doing that by making no “you” statements, as in judging, but rather using “I,” as in recognizing and expressing my own feelings and opinions in a respectful way -- taking responsibility for myself. Well, there are exceptions. I love receiving a “you” statement that suggests, as she did, that I had been helpful. It’s the blaming yous or the guessing-how-you-are-feeling yous that deprive others of dignity.
OK, that’s my thought for the day. Confusing? Hmm. Maybe that’s why I need clients to translate my psychobabble into English.
1 comment:
"It’s the blaming yous or the guessing-how-you-are-feeling yous that deprive others of dignity."
i believe that nobody can deprive me of my dignity. But it certainly feels that way often, and I certainly get pissed off - until I remember who I am. And who they are.
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